Teacher Blog Insomnia

Okay. It's one in the morning and I should not still be awake but here's the thing. I have become obsessed with teacher blogs! I don't know if its my worry about not being prepared for the new school year as a new (first time ever) teacher or maybe my need to be overly prepared with very little information except what grade I'm teaching and that I think they use Common Core standards, but it seems that the minute I click on a new blog, they have a link for another one that sounds super fun! Then after I've been sucked in, I get further sucked in by "freebies," and for a new teacher, "beg, steal, and borrow" is kinda my motto at the moment. How cool is it that all of these seasoned teachers give me their ideas for FREE?! I have downloaded more things than I know what to do with right now, but one day when I have them all organized into their own little folders inside other slightly larger folders on my flash drive, I will look back and think how smart I was for staying up past one in the morning being sucked in by (I mean, professionally researching) teacher blogs. Currently, I just remembered that I have to throw my sister's baby shower tomorrow and I probably should do so after having had some sleep. Geeze Louise, these days are flying by too quickly!

Is this a dream?

I really have nothing to say, but for the sake of consistency and not wanting to go a month without writing again I'm going to ramble on about unimportant details anyway. To be honest, I wish I had something to say because then I would feel as though things were progressing and this weren't all some big figment of my imagination I'd dreamed up.

So here's the update, as short as it is. My Nana and I went to Mississippi to visit and, with much frustration and A LOT of my grandmother's gas, found me a place to live. Apparently there's some big power plant being built and it's brought in tons of people and eaten up all the rental homes and apartments (seriously, NO APARTMENTS!). We found three places. The first one was a house in a decent school district, but we didn't really think it was worth how much they were asking (aren't things supposed to be cheaper in the south???). The second was a single wide mobile home in a really good school district. Here's how that went: we drove miles and miles and miles into the backwoods country, turned at a bunch of broken down vehicles/dump yard, and finally found four trailers parked behind a row of trees. Three other trailers rented by single men in close proximity to my family out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by miles of trees and nothing else was not really the sense of security I was seeking for my family. Also, the place was a dump and again, outrageously priced. Okay, third place. Also a single wide mobile home in a great school district, but this one was in a trailer park close to town. Not too shabby and much safer feeling. It wasn't too nice looking from the outside but when we got in it was actually quite large and live-in-able (it seemed) despite a slight weird odor that I figured could be taken care of with some fresh air and candles. Until we looked down and saw little black pepper-sized bugs all over our legs and feet. Seriously, ALL OVER our legs. EWWWW!!!! Apparently, the previous owner had a lot of cats and they had been battling cat fleas for months with no such luck. The owner was convinced that they could have them gone by the time we moved down so I (don't judge me, I was desperate) told him I would take it if the fleas were gone with a 6 month lease (as opposed to the year he was asking) and $300 less a month. He basically laughed at me and told me some plant workers would take it with the flea problem for the (very high) price he was asking. We went back to our hotel and I cried my eyes out and in pathetic desperation called my husband and told him we were not moving to "that dreadful place" and I would just substitute in Ohio until the job market changed. He sensitively told me he worked too hard to get me through school, he had already quit his job, and we WERE moving. I went back the next day and took the first place we looked at, which quite honestly seemed like a mansion after the others. 

Also, while in Mississippi, I visited the school I would be working at. I planned on seeing my classroom and leaving all my things but nobody could tell me where it was going to be and, in the midst of all the "where are we going to live" craziness, I was kind of afraid to leave anything in Mississippi as I was not too sure I ever wanted to return. So the school is an inner-city, old school (definitely a stark contrast to the farming school I student taught in last year) but that much I expected. Since being there, I have heard very little from anybody in the district. I gave them my email and they said they would be forwarding messages to me regarding meetings and important info but I having heard anything yet. I'm trying to keep in mind that it is summer, but again I'm feeling a little bit like I dreamed all of this up... 

So here's my current perspective. I will be happy when I have friends and students. People make you love a place and I love people. If nothing else, I'll drag my family to my Aunt's house every weekend to spend time with them. I already love those people. :)

By the way, we leave in 12 days. I start work in 18 days. 

Goals...

I started this blog June 10th and saved it. I was conflicted as you will see. I summed it up and finished it today...

If you had asked me what my goals were when I was 18, I would have said (in fact, I did say) that by the time I'm 27 I want to have gotten my degree, have a teaching job, be married and have 2 kids. I think God laughs when we tell Him our plans, but thankfully He also listens. My goals were certainly not reached in the order I predicted when I was 18, but they were reached. I'm 27, have an amazing husband, who is an amazing father to our two quirky, intelligent, hilarious, adorably rotten children (ages 5 and 7) . I graduated with my bachelor's yesterday and I accepted a teaching position last week.

So, the big question I've been asked a hundred times in the last few days, "How do you feel now?" I've had trouble answering this question because I feel like I cannot feel proud without feeling a lot of humility. Nobody accomplishes anything huge without a lot of support. And I cannot even begin to explain my support system. Let's just say that my real life "circles" include that amazing hubby I mentioned earlier, the best parents, brothers, sisters, and in-laws anybody could ever ask for, grandparents that have truly saved me from drowning more times than I care to admit, and a plethora of friends who have served as last minute babysitters, cheerleaders, or shoulders to cry on regularly in the last 9 years. I feel that few people in my circumstances would have been able to accomplish completing a college degree without such a support system and I am so grateful God gave me the one He did.

So I guess my point is that I have to give credit where credit is due. It would be easy to go on about having reached my goals, but the truth is that this has been a combined effort. We've all gotten me through college and I owe my family big time for that. Unfortunately, I am now leaving them all to move 700 miles away. Maybe they'll see this as me repaying them with a break! Who knows? But I'm sure going to miss everybody. But, God wouldn't have brought my family through all of this, given me that amazing support system and a vision and passion for teaching children, if He didn't have big plans in mind. He's sending us to Mississippi so that's where we'll go.

Paper Chain

383 days ago my children and I cut out 386 strips of paper and created a super-duper long paper chain. The links alternated between black and white and every 50th link was yellow so I could keep track of where I was in my countdown to graduation. We draped it around the house like garland (which my husband just LOVED by the way - yes I'm being totally sarcastic) and it wrapped from my dining room, all the way around my living room, down and back up the hallway and to the edge of the kitchen (I'll try to find the pictures to post). Trust me, when you are looking at that long of a paper chain, it makes you think you may never graduate! But my kids and I took one off every day and now here I am with three links left: one white, one black, and a final yellow one with the words "Graduation Day!" written on it. It's become a regular topic of conversation in the family now. "How many days do you have left?" or "How long is the chain?" are questions I have answered with excitement every day for the last year and some odd days.

Now with all the excitement about moving to Mississippi and getting a job, I feel like I've forgotten that the day I've been waiting for for NINE YEARS is finally here! So I think, unless somebody calls me, I'm putting away all of the crazy house hunting and planning and such until after Saturday. I've worked so hard and I want to relish this next few days before the next exciting chapter begins. YAY! THREE MORE DAYS 'TIL GRADUATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Control freak

As some may know, I get a bit hasty at times when it comes to getting things done. I try to make things fall into place immediately, making plans before I even get an idea out of my head. I'm definitely a whole picture person. So, not knowing where I'm going to live, what my paychecks are going to look like, where my hubby's going to find a job, where my kids are going to go school, when they will start school, their school supply list, how much utilities are going to cost, how we're going to get furniture, etc., etc., etc. is driving me bonkers. Like I said, I know God will take care of us, but I really wish He would let me in on the plans. I know He's in the driver seat, but sometimes I'm not even sure I'm in the same car! And for a backseat driver, that makes it really hard to control things. Maybe in God's image of this analogy He has me strapped to the top with all the luggage so He doesn't have to listen to me telling Him where to go. Hmmm...

Phone interview

So yesterday I had my first phone interview. Talk about nerve-wracking! I knew there were 4 people listening to me on the conference call, but only one was talking. I felt like a babbling idiot since I couldn't see anybody's faces. But wouldn't you just figure that an hour later, the principal of a school in my hubby's home town in Mississippi calls me up to offer me a third grade teaching position. Oh, and I'm taking it because it's a job and it might be the only one I can find.

So now... I'm drastically overwhelmed! I haven't even graduated yet! Okay, so technically I'm finished with everything. Student teaching ended last week and I didn't have to worry about finals (Praise the Lord!), but graduation is Saturday (and grad party). Oh, and might I add that school in said district starts August 1st. The Lord has taken care of us thus far, and I know he will continue, but the poor fella has his hands full with this one. I'm sure He already has this to-do list, but here is my rendition.

1. Find a place to live in a good school district at a school where I am not teaching (whole different soapbox - ask me later).
2. Find Sean a job.
3. Make money appear out of thin air.
4. Get the kids enrolled in a school.
5. Get school supplies.
6. Get school clothes for myself and the kids.
7. Get a classroom ready (and be willing to stick with whatever I choose to do).
8. Attend teacher meetings.
9. Get furniture.
10. Move.
11. Get my MS teaching license (oh, after I get my OH teaching license...)

Okay Lord, there's my rendition. I'm sure there is more. I know you're sitting up there laughing at my panicky state because you've already got all of this figured out, so I'm handing it over. You're the God of miracles... and I think I'm in need of one.

Love,

Tam